Hi All,
I need to know what is going on. There is this (F37) coworker I (M37) have been talking to for well over 2 months now. Every week day.
We have met once as we wfh. We had a lunch out with our team. However I took her for ice cream and dropped her home. Showed some chivalry as well.
However in the last week or so, there have been some hot and cold behavior from her side. She will get into a call and then abruptly leave. We used to tease each other, have some personal talks along with work talks. She comes to the video call the moment I ask her (like in 10 seconds). We have late night OT calls and she joins all of them. Lately I have been trying to limit the calls to see if she reacts. In the morning our calls used to be about an hour, I limited them to like 10 minutes. On Friday, during the morning call (she stayed back after the meeting, I did not ask her to), I said let’s sync later while she was heads down working and she stared at me and said ok. In the afternoon they used to be about 2 hours, I limited them to about 45 minutes. However on Friday, she wanted a call and we had a nearly 2 hour call in the evening before she left abruptly.
Now for the something new and weirdness:
- this week she told me the company won’t be able to function if I left (this was out of the blue)
- the next day I joked about leaving and looking for jobs. This was after our discussion on the roadmap and the fact that someone smart left. She told me if all the smart people leave, she will feel dumb.
- on Thursday I asked if she has any plans for the evening (no answer). Before the call ended, I told her that I’ll cook and eat and asked about her. No answer. Then in the evening call when she was tired and wanted rest. I told her to go rest and she said she rested, cooked and ate in the evening. She also lingered in the call for about 20 more minutes even though I wanted her to leave.
- on Friday we were expecting some OT weekend. She told me she can’t work as she won’t be home overnight and won’t have laptop. I asked if she is going out of town. She didn’t answer that and said that maybe tomorrow she will go to park if the weather is good. She abruptly left the call at 5 saying she has a meeting. Proceeded to work until 11 with a bit of a break in the middle.
- she has this “friend” that she brings up randomly during conversations. He is a male and it’s very random. She goes to movies with him, walks. She also tells me that she gets bored with his friends around as they talk about life.
I know both her friend and her have known each other for sometime but she recently changed home and lives separately.
None of our video calls are needed but we have them anyways. Last week we had 4 of them at night Monday - Thursday).
I don’t know if she likes me or is it something else. Her English isn’t great but I don’t know what is going on.
If you have any questions, feel free to write. I have a lot more info and have no idea what to put as the post will be too long.
